Saturday we had my baby's Birthday party and I totally indulged.... I had 2 huge pieces of cake, 2 sloppy Joe's, and ice cream. Today I feel like all my hard work is lost. It's a rainy dreary day today and that has really set my depressed mood. Bella's party was small with just grandparents and a friend, but I felt so bad. We don't have a lot of money right now, so we couldn't provide a whole lot for her. I know she is only 2, but with our first she had everything and then some. I feel that she is always getting left out and I hate it! I feel so bad that we can't provide as much for her. Hubby's parents take the oldest all the time, but they have only once taken Bella. So, when JR and I go out (once in a blue moon), my parents take Bella and his take Joc. As my mom keeps saying they just don't know what they are missing. And I totally agree, she is sweet, loving and so funny. Joc is the total opposite of her. When they stop to take Joc to ride her horse or go some place, it just breaks my heart because Bella just screams like someone is truly hurting her. And they are... It just showed at her party yesterday who she would rather be with... My parents. She sat almost the whole time with them and not JRs. JR says the reason that they don't take her is because of the diapers, well, GET OVER IT, SHE IS YOUR GRANDDAUGHTER AND SO DIFFERENT THAN JOC, GET TO KNOW HER! They truly don't know what they are missing with her.....
I have been trying to combat all this stress with yoga and I have a feeling that if I wasn't doing it, I would be a total mess. It's truly amazing.... I am also planning on quiting smoking tomorrow! 10/4/10 is my quit day! I have to quit for my own health and my family!
My Goals this week:
- Take a deep breath
- Keep breathing
- QUIT SMOKING!
- Commit to Fit(this is my life and I need to be healthy for not only me, but my family! This is a commitment that I must make! I always told myself that I would never get overweight, and here I am over weight. So, I am not only going to get rid of this weight, but I am committing myself to be more active than I have been, and eat healthier than I have been. This is my Commit to Fit!)
This weeks blogging Carnival is sponsored by SUBWAY and their Commit to Fit Campaign and Jared! Jared is a true inspiration!